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For all you Nicole lovers... from Prevuze

Top 10 Reasons Why Nicole Walker Is NOT A Slut
Well, we certainly caused a stir earlier this week when we called Nicole Walker a slut. The reaction from some of our readers was direct, swift and very negative. It gave me pause and as I reflected I regretted the way I had put that, but at least was thankful that I had edited out the part about her having greased panties. Anyway, we've thought this over very carefully and feel it's time for a rare Prevuze statement retraction.

I have to say I really shouldn't have used the term "slut" especially when referring to her beautiful relationship with EJ; one which as I fondly remember its tender beginning, always brings the sound of elevator music to mind for some reason.

So we would like to take this entire posting to remind our readers why our original statement in Thursday's edition is neither fair nor correct. To be succinct, and with apologies to David Letterman, we've compiled the following list of the top ten most compelling reasons why Nicole is not a slut:

10, "Slut" is so 'Nineties.' The new term is "slam hog."

9. Being paid $5 Million to marry Lucas was part of the Government Bailout.

8. When will people learn that having sex for money is NOT the definition of "slut?"

7. Her pre-nup with Victor specifically stated electrocution trumped annoying little sexual escapades.

6. The difference between porn and art is a fine line, or at least a Misty Circle.

5. A one-night-stand with Roman Brady doesn't count as sex.

4. Always remember... All porn stars are sluts, but not all sluts are porn stars. Oops... waitaminute... forget that one.

3. There is absolutely no truth to the rumor that she lived in a hotel room in order to save time.

2. According to the Penthouse Advisor, having had sex with Trent, Lucas, Victor, EJ, Roman, Colin, Brady, Eric, some schmuck named Jay and countless others in her porn films does not put her over the official "slut" threshold.

And... the number one reason Nicole Walker is NOT a slut...

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1. Absolutely nowhere does the Bible specifically ban casual sex in an elevator.

While admitting no wrongdoing, Prevuze has officially released the following public apology:

We would like to formally apologize for calling Nicole Walker a slut. This statement was made in haste and without regard to the legions of sluts everywhere we might have insulted by throwing them into the same category as Nicole. We do, however stand by our characterization of Nicole as a "ho-bag."


So, you see, even Prevuze makes mistakes. Posted Image



























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