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Ellie


http://rachelmelvinblog.blogspot.com/2009/02/on-record.html

Thursday, February 12, 2009

On record

As I'm sure you all know by now, I have decided to depart Days.

I have been with Days of Our Lives for the past four years of my life. I have nothing but gratitude and appreciation for the opportunity Ken Corday has given me, and for the growth and education I have obtained from such a hard working group of people. At this juncture in my life however, I feel I've accomplished and learned all I could have from Days, and it's just time to experience new things. I shared this insight and reasoning with Ken Corday, who was most understanding and supportive. I truely felt he was genuine in all the wonderful things he had to share with me, and I'm very grateful not only for the opportunity on the show, but for his blessing on other opportunities that might lie ahead for me. I will always credit Ken and Days for molding me into the actress I am. When I first came to the show I was terrible- there I said it- but they saw something in me, something I didn't even see in myself, and gave me a chance. Out of that chance I got recognition, amazing friends, personal growth, and even walked away with an emmy nomination. If you had asked me four years ago what I expected from life and my career, I never would have guessed any of what I actually received. It's been a rush, a whirlwind, a crash course, and at times even a rude awakening, but above anything else it's been magical. (I realize how lame that sounds, but I'm literally racking my brain for some word to describe it, and that word is absolutely fitting).

Now all that being said, I have to admit that I'm kind of disappointed in some of the rumors I've been hearing in regards to my decision to leave. People have gone so far as to speculate that I'm leaving because I "wasn't getting my way" with storylines, or that I was "disappointed with the way the show was going". I find it funny that people assume they know the rationale of someone they don't even know, in regards to information they know even less about. Unless you're in the business, it's truely hard to understand. Therefore, I wanted to take this time to explain.

My leaving has nothing to do with being disappointed by storylines. For some reason, people think I favored the "Dansea" storyline, and have pinpointed that my decision to leave, was primarily based on the writers' decision to abandon that storyline. First of all, I would never quit a job based on such an immature and unprofessional reason as 'not getting my way'....The problem with the internet and blogging is that especially when people don't know you personally, it's hard to decipher one's demeanor, sense of humor, or implications. So allow me to clarify: When I write or blog my opinions regarding my characters' storyline, I voice my opinion as an actor- the way I see my character reacting or thinking based on their psychology or influence of circumstance. It is voiced purely artistically without personal emotions altering any aspect of it. To imply I would do anything but, is really offensive to my professionalism and my personal character. At the end of the day, of course I will always do what is asked of me without hesitation or agruement, that goes without saying, but I also feel that I have a right to voice my creative input as it's portrayer, as do you the viewer.

Secondly, I understand our show has had to sacrifice many things and has been forced to take tremendous amounts of cutbacks, which have greatly altered the way we operate. But to clear the air about the other rumor, my leaving has nothing to do with the current status of the show or my current limited amount of airtime. I realize people are disappointed in some decisions that are being made, but I beg you to look at it as I do: I am not in Ken or Gary Tomlin's shoes right now, understanding the pressures, demands, or logistics of our show and its' current budget. I know at times it can be frustrating to adapt to storylines you can't get into you, or see characters you love depart, but everything comes in ebs and flows. Just understand that everyone is doing their best and no one wants to see the show suffer in any way, nor do they want to "sabotage" it. It's hard to please everyone, and right now they are doing their best given all the variables and obstacles they've been thrown. It's also important to remember, not every character you love can be on air all the time. We still have a large cast in comparison to a lot of other shows, and its hard to work everyone equally all the time. Actors also go through ebbs and flows, hell- we need to rest every now and then too. I had for the most part, four full years of heavy, steady working on this show, and I feel as though I'm one of the lucky few who get to say that.

Anyway, there is one last thing I want to add in this post and it's to my fans at curemytragedy.com: I received the birthday gift you sent to me today and I have to say, I was speechless. It was way beyond sweet and generous, and... I cried-I'm such a girl! It's just sometimes you forget that there are still good people out there, showing random acts of kindness, even to complete strangers. It's hard to remember that when at times this world can seem so dark and lonely. Thank you all so much, and please look for a more formal thank you in an upcoming issue of Digest.

Also, thank you to the other amazing fans who individually sent birthday gifts to me at the studio as well. I did receive them, and they are all so special to me. You have no idea. In the upcoming weeks, once I get a break, I will be working on a formal thank you for you also.

It's been such a pleasure entertaining you all for these last four years. As of now I don't know when I'll be shooting my last episode, but I will definitely keep you posted. And I can promise there will be much more of me to come in my future endeavors.

Rachel
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