|Viewing Single Post From: Wednesday, January 23rd Daily Discussion|
|annie21||Jan 23 2013, 10:06 PM|
On this issue of whether Nick is being abusive versus being merely controlling, I guess I perceive a lot of grey area, so I'm impressed by those who can see such a clear dividing line between the two and can declare emphatically that Nick hasn't stepped over that line. I'm not disagreeing, but I'm just not so sure either way.
While I don't think abuse is purely in the eye of the beholder, I do think that there is at least enough room for interpretation to hold open some doubt. So that's why I went out and did some searching on the net. :) Interestingly, being controlling is almost always included in the list of warning signs of an abusive type as is the case that an abuser has been abused himself in the past. (see the links below or google the topic for yourself)
For me, abuse comes down to a power imbalance in the relationship. So we have to consider both sides of the equation to determine whether abuse can occur. For example, Nick's controlling ways combined with Gabi's low self esteem sets up the circumstances for an abusive use of power by Nick over Gabi. He can give Maxine a look, but he can't abuse her because (a) she's not emotionally involved with him; (b) she has a healthy dose of self-esteem; and (c) she's older and wiser in the ways of the world, so won't hesitate to call him out on his bad behavior. But Gabi has none of those attributes, and Nick is (wittingly or unwittingly) taking advantage of that fact to get his way. To me, it's at least possible that represents an abuse of his power over her, whether or not he's doing it intentionally and whether or not she's complicit with his actions.
Edited by annie21, Jan 23 2013, 10:07 PM.
|Wednesday, January 23rd Daily Discussion · DAYS: News, Spoilers & Discussion|